There is a sense in which God makes even a prostitute into a virgin at conversion! May the girls rise up and say, “I do not want to have the marks of one man on my body and live with another in marriage”. May the men say, “I want to give myself to one woman for ever.”
For every sex act outside of marriage, the person involved is making himself one flesh with a prostitute, even if the woman is a virgin. Normally, a woman should be taking her virginity to her husband as her one gift to him. When God said that the two shall become one flesh, He was saying that there will be only one union. There is a sense in which a woman has a unique union with the man who disvirgins her. It could be a sad experience, but often it remains in her thoughts all her life.
When writing the God, Sex and You books, investigations showed that none out of over 200 women on three continents forgot the incidence when she was disvirgined. It is a solemn issue and a sacred bond is always established. Anyone who knows the facts will tell a woman to go and marry the one who disvirgined her. Also from the study, the marriages of those who were already disvirgined by another man lacked something. The scriptures cannot be broken when they say the two shall become one flesh. If they become one flesh before marriage, they have done a very horrible thing!
Many believers have never confronted the impact of their immoral past on their spiritual performance. For many who have confronted it, the repentances have been superficial. They were not deep enough to give God the grounds to heal and to recreate. There were no labours, wrestling and heart cries to God;
It is sad that people are selfish enough not to ask, “What am I taking to the person I want to marry?” The whole matter of marriage is taken lightly. People ought to ask – is it fair to marry this girl? Is it fair to marry this man? What am I taking to her? What am I taking to him? Am I taking a frightful history to him? Am I taking a frightful history to her? Without facing this and repenting, a platform is set for children who will go the same way. This is why restitution in its fullest measure is indispensable.
A girl who gave her body to men and took things from them, but who just light-hearted says, “By grace we are forgiven,” is a heap of abomination. How can she so easily get away from the shackles of the past? The least of the man’s gift to her, the least of the man’s or men’s kindness to her, their expenditures daily bear witness against her.
A girl who is not a virgin, if she has the courage to get married, may not do so until she has carried restitution to the fullest. Without a harsh termination with the past, she has no possibility for a worthwhile future in marriage. All marriage relationships started without terminating with the past are like trying to cross a bridge of cobwebs. It can only lead to further trouble. It is even shameful that after an immoral life, people are anxious to look for a partner and get blessed by the church so that they may continue in their immorality. This is because the heart has not been weaned by the radical surgery which radical repentance and total restitution brings.
It is frightful that many men do not look at a girl’s past before committing themselves. Such knowledge is indispensable to begin to ascertain that the indispensable radical repentance and restitution is carried out, and to evaluate whether the person should get into marriage at all. When you take clean water and dirty water and mix them together, what do you get? If you had sanity, you would carry out radical purification before mixing. Some people should honestly stay single. If not, their desire to marry some persons could simply be an expression of total selfishness. It may just be going to mess-up the person’s life.
If you did not settle your immoral past – deeply, thoroughly and completely, at any cost, go and do it; even if you are ten years old in the Lord.
Any unfulfilled words, make a man guilty at the door of heaven. Words once uttered cannot be called back. God said, “Let there be light”, and there has been countless years of light. The words of a man to a woman and vice versa, are not breakable.